The beginning

I guess really I should begin at the beginning.....I am going to use this as a theraphy tool, I may not share everything but then again I may share graphic details.  I need to heal my heart and soul. but there is a pattern of abuse in our family.........I'm stopping it with me

I was born in 1975 to a teenage mom and dad..........My mom was 16 when she got pg with me and then had me at 17......She ran away from home near coffeyville, ks to Des Moines, IA where I was born.  I do not know of the reason why my mom left her home but I do know that she told me at one time she was molested by her oldest brother.  They moved us back to kansas when I was 6 mths old and they split up shortly there after.  It was then that the man that I love today as my very own father entered our lives.......He enter them when I was 18 mths old.......Which would have been around Feburary 1977, which could not be right because my little brother Bobby was born in Sept of 77 and that is his dad, there is no denying it.  Each and every day he looks more and more like him.  So I would say I was closer to 16 mths old.  I don't remember much about their rocky relationship but I know my Daddy was in the Navy as a Seabee and had done 3 tours of duty in vietnam.  Vietnam really messed him up........I do remember one time of getting my butt blistered when I was in kindergarten, this was shortly before we left him.  And having to wear pants to the SRS office because I had bruises up and down my legs from where he hit me with a belt....The story behind the punishment

I was in kindergarten in Independance, Ks. (so I was 5) and school got out.  I was suppose to wait at school for my daddy to pick me up but when he didn't show.  I walked home with a friend of the family to Iola's house.  I remember making it over there and being there for awhile.  And then Daddy finally showing up.  He was mad.  He couldn't find me.  He yelled at me for not waiting for him at the school.  He told me that he was going to beat me when he got home.  And boy did he ever.  I can still remember that beating.  I don't remember where my mom was at that time.  I just remember why I got the beating.